Have you ever received a supportive comment from someone or came across a helpful expression while you were reading and thought to yourself, “YES!” It is such a good feeling isn’t it? Those moments when you believe that others understand you and can identify with your experience. Even if that person may not be in your same situation, the conversation or exchange has you feeling heard and seen. You may not even have realized that you needed to hear these words in the first place. Many people have positive intentions and want to offer encouragement to others. Have you experienced situations, however, where the support you have received has been lacking in some way? You are not alone. At times, people offer encouragement by sharing their own experiences to try and help relate to what someone may be going through (i.e. “When I was in college”) or try to minimize distress (i.e. “You don’t need to worry about that!”). While attempting to be helpful, these approaches instead tend to compare experiences that are not the same and minimize or avoid difficult or painful emotions rather than addressing them. Encouragement can come in many forms, however, when effective, it tends to put the focus on the individual and be a source of acknowledgement and empowerment.
As the new fall semester is upon us, we want to take time to share some encouraging words, and hope that you can take these statements and apply them how you best see fit. So in case you needed to hear this today:
Your experiences are valid
You have options
You have the ability to set boundaries
You are enough
Words of encouragement or affirmation can bring about a new sense of hope and purpose as well as have a positive impact on mood. It can feel wonderful to receive supportive comments from trustworthy individuals, such as family members, friends, professors, etc. However, there can be the tendency to rely on the support from others instead of turning inward for that support. Providing yourself effective encouragement or affirmations can sometimes be easier said than done, however, here are a few tips to get you started:
If you are having difficulty generating ideas, reflect on what others who are close to you would say about you. Take which comments resonate with you and then rephrase it using an “I” statement.
Ask yourself the question, “What do I need to hear the most right now?”
Try to make your affirmations as specific as possible to help make it more meaningful so that you are more willing to practice saying them.
Have the words you have chosen in some place visible that you will see every day, such as your laptop, a mirror in your room, or have it written on your phone.
It may seem strange to do this practice initially! Many people feel this way, however, with time it becomes more second nature.
Practicing affirmations can help motivate you to take action as you navigate the various aspects of college life such as juggling classes, extracurricular activities, and maintaining relationships. College can be stressful. For more tips on managing stress in college check out this THLH blog. Here are a few recent articles that provide information about stressors faced by college students as well as effective stress management techniques:
Top 10 Stress Management Techniques for Students by Elizabeth Scott, PhD (Verywell mind):
Stress in College Students: What to Know by Emma Kerr and Cole Claybourn (US News & World Report): https://www.usnews.com/education/best-colleges/articles/stress-in-college-students-what-to-know
If you are struggling to navigate current stressors at school, you may want to consider speaking to a licensed mental health professional. As long as you are a student who attends a college or university in Virginia, you are able to be seen for therapy either in-person or via teletherapy, where you can be seen virtually. If you would like more information about our practice or are interested in booking an appointment, please reach out to us here. We look forward to hearing from you!
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